6 tips: how to rebuild your personal life after a long-term relationship

Breakups are painful, though not always. If you were dating someone for fun, the breakup won't be a tragedy because it wasn't serious from the start. But a breakup that causes a lot of emotions - pain, anger, sadness, feelings of betrayal, and bitterness - are obvious symptoms of the end of a serious relationship.

SSPDaily writes about this: "Breaking up after a long-term relationship can be heartbreaking, and you may swear to yourself that you will never love or even date again. After all, during your last relationship, you got used to your partner being with you every day. And now that he is gone, you feel terrible and the future has lost all meaning."

And of course, psychologists say, in such a state, the thought of new acquaintances looks frightening. First, you need to overcome a number of psychological barriers and fully recognize them to allow yourself to move on.

How can you make sure you are finally ready for a new life, and where should you start? Here are some topical recommendations on this.

Think about what you want from your next partner

Now that you have enough time to yourself, you can use it to reflect and evaluate what you were happy with in your previous relationship and what you were not. For your convenience, you can even write everything down on paper, in two columns, listing the positive and negative points.

Such a list will help you determine what kind of person you should be looking for and focus on a healthier and stronger union.

Stay optimistic no matter what

It's hard to start fresh if your mind is clouded by negative emotions or preconceptions about dating in general. Of course, you can't be blamed, especially if you've been through a tough breakup. However, if you want your next relationship to be successful, practice optimism.

A positive attitude will create appropriate behavior and, ultimately, increase your chances of finding the right person.

Get rid of emotional baggage

Before you think about dating, you should "test" your emotional state. First, make sure that you are free of past experiences and that your heart is fully healed and strengthened to withstand the next series of ups and downs. Remember that the last thing you need is to date someone new and think about your ex.

Never compare new and old relationships

One of the biggest dilemmas faced by people who have started dating after breaking off a long-term relationship is comparing new partners to old ones. Psychologists say this is a critical mistake that should be avoided at all costs.

Comparing the present with the past is a guarantee of unsuccessful relationships in the future. As a result, you'll feel disappointed every time the other person does something different from what your ex used to do. Or you'll hurt them because they'll think that you're dating them not because they are who they are, but because they remind you of your ex.

Therefore, if it is difficult for you to give up this habit, it may be worth not starting anything new for now.

Don't get ahead of yourself

After you have finally recovered and healed from a long-term relationship, it is advisable not to rush and make many dates at the same time, but simply enjoy communication.

Don't talk about your ex

When you enter into a new relationship, try not to talk about your ex and how it all ended. By doing so, you will only drive away all candidates and lose the chance to find your happiness.

In addition, such conversations will once again show that you still harbor anger and pain, and this will definitely not be beneficial when planning a new relationship.

And if you still unconsciously return to this topic, it's best to stop dating for now and deal with your emotions.

Be honest with yourself

Regardless of whether you have experienced the breakup of a long-term relationship or not, the main rule of dating is to be yourself. Showing your true self is the only way to find your perfect match.

Stay true to yourself, your desires and needs, and pay attention to how your new chosen one behaves around you and how you feel around them.