Comedian Chelsea Handler Says She Asked Her Therapist if She Was a Narcissist

Chelsea Handler expressed concern about her empathy levels during her recent promotion of her book, I'll Have What She's Having. On The Jamie Kern Lima Show, she shared a troubling question: could she be a narcissist? Handler's awareness of her limited ability to connect with others spurred her inquiry to her therapist. This is prepared by SSP.

Handler noted, "I had sympathy and I had generosity, but they're not the same thing." She learned in therapy that developing empathy was vital. "Apparently I didn't have empathy for a long time," she stated, remarking that her upcoming 50th birthday prompts reflection. When Lima inquired whether understanding empathy is possible, Handler replied affirmatively, stating, "Yes, you can. You can totally learn empathy. That's the greatest update ever."

Handler acknowledged her past lack of awareness in considering others' perspectives. "I wasn't thinking about what it would be like to be a different person," she admitted, instead only recognizing distress and instinctively wanting to help. "The good news is you can gain empathy because it's just like turning a light on that's not on," she added.

Entering therapy confronted Handler with a deep fear. She feared being a narcissist, which pushed her to ask renowned therapist Dan Siegel directly, "Am I a narcissist? Like, I need you to really be honest with me." Siegel humorously reassured her that typically, narcissists do not seek feedback.

Handler exhaled relief, saying, "I was so paranoid that I was this bad person," admitting her struggles but emphasizing she never intended harm. Narcissism, as described by the Mayo Clinic, involves an inflated self-image combined with a lack of concern for others.

Handler has since embraced her capacity for empathy. She currently engages with the thoughts and struggles of others. "Thinking about walking in another person's shoes is now something that happens to me daily," she remarked.

She urges people to recognize that negative thoughts do not define them as bad. "Your humanity is going to create dark thoughts. We all have a shadow self," she explained. Handler identified this awareness as liberating, fostering her desire to promote goodness, stating, "I want to be a good person and I want to help other people be good women."

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